Monday, July 25, 2011

Friday, July 22, 2011

M.I.A.


I've been completely MIA as of late. But only because I've been a working fool and when I get home at night I'm completely exhausted!

I've been doing things that have to do with:


And I have been loving it. It makes it fun too when patients are crazy and make you laugh. And you get paid pretty decent. And you are on your way to buying a mac. Don't have time to update a ton now....but life is good.

Monday, July 11, 2011

motherhood

I am so excited to be a mother! we had a lesson in Relief Society on family relationships and for part of that we talked about motherhood. I can't wait to be a mom!!!

I know its going to be a lot of work, and its going to test my patience, and I'm going to fail at some things at first, but I can't wait. Sometimes I've been tempted to put marriage on hold just until I finish the next thing on my list, but I've always always wanted to be a mother, that has never changed.

Little Beck that I've talked about before has been the reason why! Ever since I can remember I wanted to be a mom, but being able to see him just about everyday of his life until I graduated 3 months ago was just such a tender mercy. He taught me so much, just like my own kids will. He was so quick to be excited about all the little creations and cool flowers and birds and whatever else and taught me to recognize more fully everything the Lord has given me. Its amazing how a little two year old boy could help me feel the love of God more.

I see moms all the time on facebook complaining about their kids, not just on a rough day, because I know rough days will come, and I know I won't be complaint free, but like a couple days a week. And their comments make me want to ask, "Do you enjoy being a mom at all? Because it sure doesn't sound like it!" Who cares if someone wakes someone else up at 7:30 when they normally get up at 8! Who cares if your daughter has her shoes on the wrong feet and doesn't want to switch them! I know all you moms are like, "Just wait till you are a mom!" And I will, I'm sure I'll eat my words in some areas...but I am SO excited for the day that the Lord chooses to bless me with a husband, but ESPECIALLY with children.

I. Can't. Wait. <3

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Satan invented Cataracts....

I had an epiphany this week, and that was that Satan invented cataracts.

Let me tell you how this came about. I was screening a patient who had just had cataract surgery the day before and and she sat down and she said, "I didn't realize how foggy my vision had become, until Dr. Fogg took the cataract out. Now I can see the world so much clearer then I ever remembered it being."

A cataract is the hardening of the lens in your eye and it makes colors become less vibrant and makes everything dull and foggy. A lot of times cataracts develop so slowly people don't realize how much their vision has gone because it was such a slow process.

So, I thought about what this patient said all week, and I've decided that Satan invented cataracts. He doesn't just completely blind us spiritually in one blow, but he slowly blurs our vision, he slowly makes the Lord's plan a little bit foggy so that we lose sight of whats important and we can't fully see the path any longer. Sometimes he is so subtle and he blurs our vision so slowly, that we don't even realize that our vision is changing at all.He gives us little temptations to start with and from there it snowballs into something much bigger and much more destructive if we aren't careful.

I think at times in our lives we all have spiritual cataracts that we need to take care of. Thank heavens for the Atonement of Jesus Christ and the power of Repentance. Luckily though, unlike physical cataracts, spiritual ones can be completely avoided. It is really our choice if we choose to give in to those spiritual "risk factors" and slack off on the most important things.

I've seen this since I have graduated college more than ever before. For me, its been the spiritual cataract of pessimism. I've had a really hard time going to the YSA ward that I live in. And I've had a really hard time seeing the people and the situation there in a positive light. Its a TINY ward and its just so different then what I am used to at BYU-Idaho. My attitude in the ward has been that you could probably make a singles ward 3 out of it, which I still stand by but find more humor it in now! :) But today I was gently reminded of how close the Lord is to the people in that ward, and I was reminded of how much the Lord not just loves them, but loves and knows me. I was shown so clearly how the path that I've walked up to this point in life has put me here for a reason, and I'm not just in Fresno by chance. I've tried to put my desires on hold and figure out what the Lord wants.

Life can be crazy sometimes, but I am so grateful for the crazy parts of it and know that it will all work out.